16. Amnon’s Bread
Tamar went to the house of her brother Amnon, who was lying down. She took some dough, kneaded it, made the bread in his sight and baked it. Then she took the pan and served him the bread. 2 Samuel 13:8–9a “So, a guy named Amnon liked the Bread of Lawlessness more than anyone, huh?” Hanan repeated. He thought for a moment before asking, “Was he the guy that fell in love with his own half-sister, Tamar?” “That’s the one,” Emet confirmed. “Do you recall how the story goes?” “I remember that Amnon became so obsessed with Tamar that he made himself ill.” Hanan shook his head, and reluctantly began to say, “I think it was his dream to—” “It was Amnon’s dream to sleep with his own sister,” Emet finished, sensing Hanan’s discomfort. “Yeah,” Hanan said with a mixed look of disgust and embarrassment. “What was he thinking?” “Well, he was thinking that since he had the urge to do something, it must be fine for him to do it. And in Amnon’s little lump of dough, that thought was his Truth.” Folding his arms over his chest, Emet continued. “So, the story starts with a perversion. A man wants to sleep with someone he should never be thinking about in that way—not if he’d been living according to God’s Truth—and his obsession caused him to come up with a terrible plan.” “Yeah,” Hanan replied, remembering what happened next. “Amnon lay in bed, pretending to be sick. He asked for Tamar to come and”—Hanan’s eyes grew wide as he recalled—“and bake him some bread!” Emet pursed his lips, then sadly quoted Amnon. “‘Bring the bread here into my bedroom so I can eat from your hand.’ But when Tamar took it to him to eat, he grabbed her and said, ‘Come to bed with me, my sister.’” “But she refused, right, Grandpa?” Hanan asked. He searched his mind for how the story proceeded. “Didn’t she say, ‘Don’t force me; such a thing should not be done in Israel’?” “That’s exactly what she said, because she was living according to God’s Truth. But Amnon refused to listen to her.” Pausing for a moment, Emet continued slowly, “And since he was stronger than she was, he—” “—he raped her,” Hanan finished the sentence quietly. “It’s like Amnon took the pure Unleavened Bread his sister had made and put some of the Yeast of Herod into it, turning it into the Bread of Lawlessness.” “Indeed,” Emet said. “But, get this. The story goes on to say that after he raped her, Amnon hated Tamar intensely.” “Right.” Hanan replied, recalling the conclusion of the story. “In fact, it says he hated her more than he had loved her. But why, Grandpa?” “This is the nature of the Yeast of Herod, remember?” Emet began. “It hates whenever its version of Truth and Grace is corrected or confronted with God’s Truth and Grace. The Yeast of Herod likes to think it can live with its own Truth—this or that is right for me because I say so—when in reality, we are not to be creators of Truth; we are to be confronted by Truth. It shapes us. We don’t shape it.” “I see,” Hanan said thoughtfully. “So, Amnon hated Tamar because she said, ‘this shouldn’t be done’?” “That’s right; she confronted him with Truth,” Emet agreed. “And did you notice how Amnon extended no Grace to her—even after violating her in such a violent way?” Emet looked at the loaf of bread in the lower left quadrant as he continued. “You see, when we eat the Bread of Lawlessness, it leads us to hunger for power—to be the ones who decide what is right and acceptable—and it curbs any craving for authentic Truth.” “Which means we start to think we can do whatever we want,” Hanan observed. “Yes. And eating this bread suppresses our appetite for Grace too.” As he sat down on the stool across from Hanan, he clarified, “In other words, ‘Don’t you dare tell me there might be a Truth or standard I should submit myself to. And if you do suggest such a thing—’” “—I’ll kill you,” Hanan finished decisively. “I suppose if you’re Herod, but it often doesn’t reach that extreme,” Emet said, chuckling. “In most cases, this bread just leads us to sever any and all relationships with people who might think differently than we do. There’s no Grace for any disagreement with my Truth, so I’ll only surround myself with those who agree with and validate my Truth.” Hanan took in a deep breath, then exhaled slowly. “This has been a lot to take in, Grandpa.” Noticing the deepening shadows in the shop, Emet realized it was getting late in the day. Pointing at the unleavened loaf in the top right quadrant, he announced, “We’ll talk about this one tomorrow morning. How does that sound?” Grabbing the unleavened loaf as he stood with a mischievous look, Hanan said, “I don’t think we can do that, Grandpa.” “Oh? And why not?” Hanan tore off a piece and tossed it into his mouth. “Because this bread might be gone before we get home.” Emet stood as well and patted Hanan on the back. “That just means you’re in charge of making another loaf of Unleavened Bread in the morning.”
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